Top Ten Cruise Etiquette Tips

A few customers have booked their very first cruise through me recently, (their first cruise, not their first cruise through me). One of the most common themes of their questions was about what to expect onboard and how they should act in different situations. I’ve put together this quick guide on basic cruise etiquette but I’m sure you all have your own ideas and opinions so please, in the spirit of helping all Newbie Cruisers everywhere, add your own suggestions to the bottom of this post, how you should behave whilst onboard, (or how you wish others would behave)!


Happy Reading

1. Please try not to expect perfection. With some of today’s ships carrying up to three or four thousand people at a time, trust me, the experience isn't going to be perfect for everyone. Your toilet may clog. The handle may fall off the sliding door. Your table mates may sometimes be rude. Have a good attitude, keep smiling and your cruise will go a lot more smoothly. When you smile, the whole ship smiles with you.

2. Don’t be scared of the stairs. Fact: The lifts are going to be crowded around dinner and show times. A bunch of crabby people waiting for the elevators will only stir each other up even more; I’ve seen it happen time and again, if you can take the stairs, then my advice is to use them. With the queues at the lifts 9 times out of ten it’ll be quicker anyway.

3. Be aware that there are always other people within earshot. It isn’t necessary to slam your cabin door each time you enter and exit the cabin, and it is rude to do so at 3 a.m.(some passengers actually sleep — at night! — on a cruise). Close the door slowly and preserve some of the peace.

4. Be aware of others sensibilities. Nobody likes a sloppy drunk. Just because nobody minds if you drink yourself sick at home, it doesn’t mean it’s the same on your cruise. Be respectful that this is someone else’s holiday as well.

5. We all board the ship equal, but some seem to think they are more equal than others. Aboard ship, we are all equals. I don’t need to see your Rolex watch or that 10-carat diamond or hear you bragging about how much you paid for your suite. Were all on the same cruise, lets just enjoy it.

6. There’s no such thing as a foreign language. It’s just a different language. To the locals you’re speaking the foreign language. It doesn’t matter how slowly you speak or how loud you speak, there’s a good chance the locals wont understand you. I find phrase books very useful for this. “How much is the beer?” “Which way to the good looking women?” etc. It's just respectful.

7. Be a good audience member. If you are tired, don’t sit in the front row. How demeaning is it to a performer who is giving his or her all to look out and see an audience member nodding off mid-performance?

8. Stop Moaning. If something has gone wrong or you are unhappy, there's no need to drag a few thousand other people into your mess. There is a simple solution: Ask management to correct the problem. Moaning just brings everyone down and who knows, your expectations may be way out of line.

9. Dress for public view. If you wouldn’t walk into Tesco wearing shorts and no top, you probably shouldn’t wear that on the ship either. Unless you’re in the pool. That’s fine. It just looks out of place in the Main Dining room, (as a tuxedo would in the pool).

10. Don’t lecture people. If your table mates have decided they don’t like the idea of tipping, or have used the wrong fork for the wrong dish, remember, it’s rude to point it out to them. As the Beatles famously said, just Let it Be.

Happy Cruising