Top ten ways to tell you’re on an American cruise ship…………..

1. A pizza can be delivered to your cabin faster than the doctor can get there.

2. People are ordering double cheese burgers, large fries, and a diet coke
3. Everyone you pass by says "hey, how are you?" and then keeps on walking.
4. The metric system is non-existent, and unintelligible to most Americans, however Cola is still sold by the litre.
5. There isn’t actually any Americans onboard, just Irish-Americans, Italian-Americans, German-Americans, Swiss-Americans, Swedish-Americans, Jewish-Americans, African-Americans, Mexican-Americans etc...
6. All the waiting staff will end a conversation with “y’all have a nice day now” but not actually care.
7. You can watch the international news section on the ship TV’s and come away a lot more knowledgeable about the latest results of American Idol and what the scores were in last nights football game. (I won’t even start on American football, where would I begin?).
8. The smallest portions of food available are what we Brits would call ‘Super Sized’.
9. Every time you order a cup of tea the waiter ends up throwing it overboard. (This can be an even worse problem if you happen to be docked in Boston).
10. Every time you order chips with your dinner you end up with a big bowl of Doritos.

I know I said top ten but I’ve just thought of this one and thought it definetley needed including.

11. Gratuities. Enough said.



Happy Cruising